Don’t Blink
Matt and I watched a TON of the newer Dr. Who series this summer. In the week or two before Noah was born, we watched an episode called “Blink.” It was one of the creepiest of the dozens we watched, but the basic idea was that if these two people looked away from these weeping angel statues (which were really some sort of alien thing) then the angels would get them. The message of the episode was “Don’t blink. Blink and you’re dead.”
Lately, I’ve been feeling like we’re in a “don’t blink” season of our lives. Babies grow up so fast. Noah is going to be eight weeks old on Friday. And, in exactly one month, Ava will be three. Is it just me or is time actually going faster? There’s no way that our first baby is 30 days from three years old. And, seriously, my newborn is turning into a baby more quickly than I can process. We may not have any alien angel statues coming after us, but substitute “missed memory” for “angel” and the story is the same. Blink and you miss it. Blink and the alien creature called parental guilt will swallow you whole.
I’ve been trying to slow down and be present, especially when the kids are awake – to recognize actively the moments I won’t want to miss. With work and daycare schedules, it’s so easy to get sucked into the need-to-do’s around here when we get home. It’s harder to just let go and be present with two than with one. It’s harder to do while working than it was when I had more moments at home. It’s harder when I’m home alone. I don’t intend to make excuses, but to acknowledge the challenges. It’s hard to not blink. I’m in a staring contest with my own life.
So, for the me who will be reading this blog in a few years or months trying to remember what these months and days were like, here are some of the moments driving me to keep my eyes open.
Ava riding the carousel before seeing Beauty & the Beast at the Outdoor Movie.
Sweet, sweet baby smiles. I get one like this after I feed him. His way of saying “thanks,” I think.
A first ride in a stroller together. Ava pointed out every single Halloween decoration in the neighborhood.
A sweetheart of a sister helping her baby brother feel better with a binky.
Here’s to trying not to blink. I’m certain it will be worth the effort.